Tiger lusts as
Yvonne Robb stripped down to her underwear during the
1999 Open at Carnoustie, surprising Tiger Woods as he
waited to putt.She was fined $160 for her
antics, after planting a kiss on Tiger's cheek. |
During the 1997
British Open at Royal Troon, Nikki Moffat, complete with
tiger stripes and floppy ears in homage to Tiger Woods,
pranced around No. 18 just before Justin Leonard was
given the trophy. |
At the 2003
British Open, this streaker waited until the trophy
presentation to strut her stuff on the course, with that
year's champion Ben Curtis looking on. |
Jacqui Salmond, took a turn around the flag stick at St.
Andrews during the 2000 British Open as Tiger Woods's
group made their way to the green.
|
 Jacqui Salmond, 20, from Kirkcaldy Fife
Scotland is one of the all time streaking greats.
And her exploit is the most well documented. Though
I find her too anorexic for my taste, I admire her
brazenness in appearing with zilch clothing, mearly
glasses and make up, at a very public event. Even
though she was only seeking publicity, that is an
extremely brave thing to do (just try it!) and
should serve as a model for others. I really feel
sorry for Tiger Woods who seems to be a female
streaker magnet. He said later that her actions had
spoiled the final hole of his championship-winning
round. I wish I could be that lucky. At that time
Jacqui lived with her boyfriend along with her
children Brendan (3) and Rhys (18 months) in
Edinburgh. Jacqui and her boyfriend had planned the
streak for a laugh. "In July 2000 my partner, Ryan
Grieg, 27, was watching The Open on telly. 'How can
you watch this?' I yawned. The whisper of the
commentator and polite applause were enough to send
me into a coma. Then it hit me. I knew what would
get the crowd excited. A streaker. And who better
than me? Shelater told The Mirror: "I just want to
be famous and see my picture in as many publications
as possible. I hope to talk my way on to the sofa
with Richard and Judy on This Morning." "As a pole
dancer at the Burke and Hare pub in Kircaldy, Fife I
wasn't shy about flashing a bit of flesh. The appeal
of an even bigger audience was just too much to
resist. 'That crowd needs a bit of livening up,' I
said to Ryan, telling him my plan. 'You what?' he
spluttered. 'Go on then.'She hoped the streak would
help her escape her sordid carrer as a lap dancer
stripping on a pool table for stag night drunks. She
even contacted a tabloid newspaper to tell them of
her intentions "So two weeks later... I dressed in a
(black) floaty summer dress with no underwear,
dropped our son, Brendan, 3 and 1-year-old daughter,
Rhys, off with my mum Jackie Salmond, 46, and drove
twenty miles to the famous golf course. 'Nervous?'
Ryan asked when we arrived, offering me a can of
lager. But I didn't need any Dutch courage. I was
raring to go. Ryan and I arrived early to get a good
spot on the course. "Finally at 3pm Tiger was at the
18th hole. It was time. I pushed to the front of the
crowd, crouched down and slipped the strap of my
dress off my shoulders. Fresh air blasted my naked
body. It was now or never. "I burst through the
cordon and legged it towards the 18th hole, arms in
the air and as naked as the day I was born.
Adrenalin raced through me as I waited for the
reaction. For a moment there was silence, followed
by a few gasps and titters. 'Wahey,' one bloke
shouted. Then everyone started cheering as I legged
it round the pole. "Egged on by the crowds I even
did a little victory dance. But then I spotted two
police officers running towards me. 'Enough of
that,' one of them said covering me up with a
fluorescent police coat. I was still giggling but
then I saw the officer's stern face. 'That was so
stupid,' he said as he handcuffed me. 'It was only
meant to be a joke…' I whimpered.
"At
Cupar police station I was charged with breach of
the peace and given a white forensics suit to wear.
I spent a night in the cells feeling like a
criminal. What I'd done began to sink in. Talk about
a moment of madness." She said, "I ... was left in a
cell on my own for about four hours. About 11.30
they put me in with the two other female streakers."
A total of five people had streaked the open,
encouraged by an offer of a 10,000 pounds prize from
a mystery mischief maker. Carol Louttit had been
brought from Methil Police Station and we had a
great laugh singing and making up songs. Carol said
she'd done the streak because she was drunk and
Julie (Methven) did it on the spur of the moment. We
were singing and laughing all night. We even plotted
to do a streak together. It's never been done before
but we intend to run naked hand in hand at some
major event." Jaqui said, "Missing Brendan and Rhys
like crazy, I wondered what they would make of their
mummy showing her bits to the world? The next day I
admitted breaching the peace at Cupar Sheriffs Court
and was fined Ł100. The procurator fiscal was
scathing. 'Disruption can prove a great distraction
to the players,' he said.
"'Thank God that's over,' I said to Ryan as we drove
home. 'Think again,' he replied handing me a pile of
newspapers. Torn off a strip…naked birdie at the
18th raged the headlines. Tiger Woods had told
reporters that I'd interrupted his special moment.
And each headline was accompanied by a big picture
of me. Naked. "People all over Britain were gawping
at my boobs as they tucked into their cornflakes. A
few men looking at me dance in the club was one
thing. Now pictures of me in all my glory were all
over the county, from breakfast tables to building
sites. "But the worst call of all was from Mum. She
sounded so disappointed. 'Why did you do it?' she
sighed. 'It was just a joke,' I said lamely. But it
didn't feel so funny any more. Wherever I went
people were asking the question, 'aren't you the
girl who..?'" Unfortunately, Royal and Ancient
officials planned to review security in an attempt
to reduce such incidences in the future. "I wanted
to streak because I thought it would be a bit of a
laugh - a harmless piece of fun. But I was arrested,
spent a cold night in the cells and appeared in
court the next day." Procurator fiscal Ted Russell,
himself a low handicap golfer who plays over the St
Andrews links, said: "Clearly the maintenance of
good order depends on the good behaviour of the
public." (I can't think of any better way to behave)
"In addition, disruption can prove a great
distraction to the players, who are under great
pressure." (I would pay to have such a distraction!)
Her solicitor Tom Anderson told the court: "There
was an element of naivety and it has been much
publicised that there was money available to anyone
who would do it. Unfortunately, that appears not to
have been the case." Commenting on the streakers,
Peter Dawson, R&A secretary, added: "It's
mindless, and the way I think to get rid of it is to
ignore it." "I ended up with a Ł100 fine. I thought
that the punishment was a bit harsh as I didn't hurt
anyone and the crowd throughly enjoyed it. I didn't
show anything the rest of the female population
doesn't have. Ryan said he thought it was funny when
I did it, and it certainly doesn't bother him. Mind
you he reckons that if he'd suggested it I would
have given him a hard time for the rest of his life!
But the police told me that they take a hard line
because streaking offends some people." Jacqui
worked as a lap dancer in the Burke and Hare pub in
Edinburgh to make a living and had ambitions to
become a successful model. "Then in July 2001 Ryan
and I decided to split. We were still great mates
but the spark wasn't there. Shortly after I fell
pregnant during a short relationship. When I gave
birth to my son John at Forth Park hospital on 4th
February 2003 I was prepared to raise him alone.
"The only male attention I got was when I was
dancing and I wished that I'd meet a bloke who
wanted me for more than my figure. And when John was
18 months I got my wish. On a rare night off I was
dancing – fully clothed - at Liquid Rooms nightclub
in Edinburgh when I saw Colin Snow, 38. I couldn't
take my eyes off him.
"Before I went home I made sure he had my
number. Colin called the next day and set a date a
week later. As we stood at the bar of a pub, I
played with my straw nervously and listened to Colin
telling me about his work as a confectionary
salesman. 'And what do you do?' he asked. I took a
deep breath. 'I'm an.. err pole dancer,' I said.
Colin's face fell. 'Oh, ' he said. "After a reaction
like that I could hardly go on to tell him that my
bum had been on the front of The Sun!
'I'm thinking of quitting the dancing,' I said,
desperate to stop him dashing out the door. But as I
said the words I realised something. I meant them. I
hadn't been enjoying it since I was in the papers.
The next day I handed in my notice at the bar.
"Colin was
thrilled. 'I don't know if I could date a stripper,'
he admitted. I loved my new lifestyle, curling up in
the evenings with Colin rather than wiggling my bum.
I even plucked up the courage to tell Colin about my
brush with fame. 'Blimey,' he chuckled. Funnily
enough he couldn't even remember the story. 'You
must be the only bloke in Scotland,' I said. "I
loved my new life but with the kids at school and
Colin at work I was bored. In January 2005 I decided
to have a clearout. 'I have these to donate,' I
said, pushing a bulging bag of clothes over the
counter at the British Heart Foundation shop in
Lochgelly. The Heart Foundation had always been
close to my, well, heart. When I was 6 I was
diagnosed with a heart murmur. It meant that I
suffered with palpitations but knew that I was one
of the lucky ones as I managed to control the
condition with a sensible diet.
"I spotted a sign. 'Could you help in the shop?' it
read. Perfect. 'I'd love to volunteer,' I said. They
were over the moon. So I went from an erotic
dancer/streaker to a loved up lady who works in a
charity shop. Talk about a transformation! And two
years on I still love my life. Chatting to the old
ladies who come in and giving up my free time for
charity gives me a million times more satisfaction
than getting my kit off. "From now on I'm happy
keeping my curves for myself. And Colin of course."
|
Jacqueline Salmond, 20, of
Kirkcaldy, Fife, was fined Ł100 after Cupar sheriff
court heard how she ran naked across the course at
St Andrews and danced around the flag as competitors
were driving from the 18th tee. She admitted breach
of the peace. Carol Louttit, 37, of Inverurie,
admitted breaching the peace on Friday when she
stripped off on the 16th green. Julie Methven, 23,
of Cupar, who ran on to the 18th fairway wearing
only her shorts on the same day, also admitted the
offence
|
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The
following was written on
www.firstfoot.com
There has been much
outrage in the Scottish
broadsheets recently about the
membership policies of the
Honourable Company of Edinburgh
Golfers will host the British
Open golf tournament at
Muirfield golf course in East
Lothian in 2013. Apparently,
these terrific chaps have a
far-sighted way of dealing with
members who are other than male,
white, anglo-saxon and rich.
FirstFoot takes some liberties
in the paraphrasing, but
basically the rule reads:
If ye dinnae
huv a white willie an' a big fat
wallet, then fuck aff, yer no
getting in an' ye cannae play
oan wurr golf course eether.
Naw, dinnae send us any
questions, jist fuck aff.
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St.Andrews Trophy Room

FirstFoot applauds such progressive
thinking in this age of increasing
liberalisation. However, we would suggest
that the following rules should also
apply:
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No
blacks |
No
mentally handicapped |
No
socialists |
No muslims
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No lesbians or gays
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No musicians
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No female underarm hair
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No working class riff-raff
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No newspapers apart from
The Telegraph
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FirstFoot would like
to see a new Bill in the Scottish Parliament
making all Honourable Company of Edinburgh
Golfers golf courses public parks. The Bill
would also allow for the running of free
busses from all Scottish urban housing
estates.Cannabis
cafes
would
be allowed and help centres for gay
one-legged lesbians would be opened.
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